Lean on me

I hit the 10lb mark this weekend! Yay!!!!! I have another15 to hit my lowest but hey....whose counting. I have learned these last couple weeks that my body will tell me when I'm hungry and sometimes I can tell my body to shut up. :) My portion sizes have been next to nothing, I've been eating to survive. Yes Ive been a little stressed. What can you say, its going to happen. Sometimes life throws you a curve ball and all you can do is catch it and throw it back. I believe, finally, that I threw it back yesterday......we will see...
 Normally I would call myself a stress eater. I eat when I'm out of control. Usually stress lasts for a couple days and  I might gain 3 to 4 lbs. This has been going on for a couple months now. Really intense for the past several weeks and when I reach for the candy or the burger or the chips, they taste like sawdust. I realize a couple bites in that it is not fixing the problem so I stop eating. I have been drinking a lot of diet soda, probably not the greatest filler. But oh well. I guess what I'm saying is that stress, this time was good for me. I have a new understanding with food. I have a new happy place. walking...or running.....or biking.
 Stress sucks. It sucks and I have generally avoided it at all costs. That couldn't happen this time. It was a way to close for comfort. I always thought I was the layed back sort of girl. The girl who would always be there for others, but when it comes to me, deal with it on my own. I have discovered that the reason we have friends is to build each other up. It is comforting to know that there are different levels of friendship, and sometimes when crap flies the ones that you have taken so long to build up will be there when you need them the most. I have learned that when you need help, people cant guess. You have to ask for it. It is important to be receptive to what your people are going through, because sometimes asking for help just is not in your vocabulary. I appreciate the friends I have even more this week than last. I am grateful for those who know me well enough to say, come on lets talk. I have always relied on family for that, and right now I have many champions in my corner and I know I have many more if and when I need them. Family who are near and far. My mother, who is not always the best at dealing with stress, has taken the ball and run with it this time, I don't usually turn to her for help. She has been my biggest champion. My sister who has tried to make me laugh, even though she doesn't know the situation, and my close friend who just sent me a text that said lets talk, I'm worried. All of this support got me through a tough one. I'm not all the way there yet, but I am gonna be. And it wasn't food that got me there....